People I have Met Over the Course of My Life - Part 1

This is the first in a series of profile pieces by Tucker that focus on the many people he has met over the course of his life. Tucker is a people person and a person pleaser. He likes being around people and having them around him.

To kick things off, this is a picture of Tucker's parents. He sees them pretty much most every day. He likes them because they are kind to him and feed him and give him things to put in his mouth like mail that he then romps around with until he mangles it...

What he likes most is the way his dad pats him on his head, as if to say, "That'll do Tuck, that'll do." His dad usually gets up early to let Tucker and his siblings out of the house in time to go the bathroom. Sometimes, though, it is not early enough. After going the bathroom, his dad lets Tucker inside and then lines him up on the threshold for the kitchen and prepares the breakfast. Every one of his siblings has his or her own food dish and Tucker likes to drool on the linoleum as he waits for his food.

Then his dad pads around all morning getting ready for work. Tucker follows him from one room to another. If his dad stops a minute, Tucker lays down and gets ready to take a nap. Sometimes, though, Tucker likes to walk up to his dad at the computer and paw at his side. This gets his dad to scratch his neck and pat his head. Then his dad goes away for the day to work in the salt mines.

When he returns, Tucker's dad plays with him and sometimes they play outside in their big yard. Then Tucker's dad lines him up with his siblings to feed him again. This time, though, his dad brushes Tucker's teeth. Tucker doesn't much like this but the toothpaste is yummy. After dinner, Tucker follows his dad from room to room and finally settles down when his dad picks a room to sit in for a period of time.

As you can see, Tucker has a pretty full day with his dad. Sometimes, Tucker's dad lets him up on the couch or on the bed. This is very nice because it means Tucker can see out the window or lord over his siblings.

Tucker is spending today hand-writing an ode to his mother before putting it on the computer. He believes his mother is the smartest and most beautiful woman ever and her post deserves a little more thought than someone as silly as his dad.

Anti-Reality

This morning, Tucker watched the big floats and balloons on TV despite the awful song and dance numbers that the TV people thought viewers might like. He liked seeing the big balloons careen through the steel and glass canyons of NYC. The entire display reminded him of a dream he had once where he could fly and then save puppies who cried out for help.

Following this show, however, the TV wanted to show Tucker something that made his head hurt and tummy ache. He could not understand why TV would care to show him the intimate details of boring people. Someone had put the channel on the show where people fought with each other to be good cooks, then they fought with each other to stay on an island, then to stay in a house, and then there were shows that made no sense at all. Some shows people just fought, shopped, then made up and rode around in expensive cars. These people were not particularly pretty or smart or interesting or even worth watching. But zippy music and off-screen shouts made the shows seem dynamic. This gave the illusion of purpose and intellect leading to an imagined sense of discovery. Tucker was not fooled. He thought the people in these shows, the people who make them, and the people who watch them need to spend more time doing real things. Interesting things. Like running through a pile of leaves. Or play a good game of "catch the stick out my mouth when I run by you" with their siblings until they are all winded and the parents call them inside to rest. Or Ninja Squirrel chasers.

Tucker thinks these shows not only lack imagination, but work to deaden the imagination and creativity of those who watch them. And this makes Tucker sad. He thinks that if people want something about real reality, then they should watch something like this that document how awful some kids have it and why people should open their homes and hearts more.

The holidays are always very exciting for Tucker. His parents are abuzz with chores and Tucker just wants to help. For example, when his mom gets out the big purple pushy thing and plugs it in, Tucker helps her by mashing dirt and leaves into the carpet after she finishes pushing it there.

Meanwhile his brother YHP sneaks downstairs and tries to eat the cat's food. And Chester Copperpots doesn't care because he is kinda lonely for friends so he lets YHP do it because it is like he is spending time with him. What a cat thing to think.

But what makes him sad is that his sister always seems to do something that gets her sent to bed for most of the day. Sure they all get wound up knowing it is something special that is happening, but his sister expresses her joy in somewhat destructive ways.

Just yesterday, Tucker's sister Dexter decided that it would be a good idea to taste test the muffins their mom made for dinner while the parents were away at work. Needless to say, Tucker's mom was not pleased to find all but 3 of the muffins gone and Dexter playing like she was innocent. And of course The Baron told his mom that he had absolutely nothing to do with the muffin heist.

Tucker, however, is on his best behavior now for the home stretch to Christmas. Making sure he doesn't ruin his chances for all the presents he has asked for this year.

Thankful beautifulness

Tucker likes to look at and look like all things beautiful. He is thankful that his handsome face and jovial countenance sprang him from the Phoenix pokey a few years ago. And he knows a lot of other kids haven't been so lucky.

Rather than dwell on the sadness of that fact, Tucker, being Tucker, would like to share some of the more beautiful things he sees every day in hopes that others will be inspired to see the world as a pretty ok place full of friends and trees and squirrels to chase and time to spend with family. Here are some of the nice things Tucker sees:

This is Tucker's house in the spring. He likes the flowers because they attract bees. He like to put the bees in his mouth.

This is Tucker's dad in the snow. He likes it when the old man is wrapped up like a funny person. Tucker likes the snow and the cold and could play in in for days and days.

These are the pretty leaves on the trees at Tucker's house in the Fall. The leaves come off the trees and Tucker chases his siblings through the piles like a ninja stalking gazelles.

This is a homemade apple pie that Tucker's mother made. She is the best chef. Sometimes she feeds Tucker apples and makes cookie treats for him. These make his mouth and belly happy.

Back to normal

Tucker is happy that his dad is home and mom is feeling better. He knows now that there will be a lot of nice cookie treats for him to eat while he plays in the yard. It was nice having his mom home for the week because he got to curl up on the couch with her and guard her from the bad kids.

He is glad that his dad is home because he can now follow him around the house in the morning. Following humans around and trying to trip them is one of Tucker's favorite games. That and playing stealth Ninja.

Just us for all

Sometimes it seems that things aren't exactly fair and everything for young Tucker. His brothers are all tinier than him and as result they crowd the couch with the humans so there is no room for Tucker. So he has to watch TV most nights from the floor right beneath the humans' feet. Tucker sure wishes his parents would choose quality over quantity when deciding who to let up on the couch -- one big fluffy dog is equally as good a choice as two inky black dogs and black cat.

For now, though, Tucker will take it in stride knowing that when it comes to jumping high and running fast, he is still the best and no one can beat catch the stick out his mouth when he has it.

Gladiators!

Tucker is excited. Tucker is very happy. Tucker likes the white silly snow that falls from the sky and lands on his nose. Tucker likes to run around in it as it falls and imagine he is a superhero dodging soft, fluffy meteorites that would hurt other creatures, but since he is a super hero, he is all like ok and stuff. Yes, Tucker is wound up.

Tucker overheard his mother today talking with his father about how it was snowing at their home. Snow? Thought Tucker. I like Snow! So Tucker and his sister, Dexter, rushed to be let out while Baron and YHP hid beneath blankets (Chester was nowhere to be found at this time). Tucker's mom let him out and he proceeded to prance like he does for his friend, the snow. Than he remembered the real reason why he likes the snow. It is because he can more easily tease his sister into a game of Gladiator! It is especially fun when Tucker's mom dresses them up in their combat gear. It gives him extra layers of protection against Dexter's sharp teeth. But Tucker knows his sister doesn't really want to hurt him. They are just playing fun good times.

Oh boy, presents, i think

Tucker has been wondering where his dad went. It has been a couple of days since he saw him. He likes to follow his dad through the house and sit at his feet in whichever room his dad stops in. Tucker really likes to be with people.

Anyhow, Tucker has been trying to puzzle out just where that old human went. Did his mother finally get so mad with him that she buried him the back yard? No, Tucker and his siblings would have been able to sniff him out like a rotting Easter Egg. Did his dad go to London to visit the queen, like they sing in that song? Probably not. London is one of his father's least favorite cities.

Tucker sat and thought and thought and sat and all he could come up with was that the cold weather outside reminded him that Christmas is coming soon. Tucker likes Christmas, just like he likes chasing tennis balls and parading with a stick in his mouth past his siblings. Christmas is fun because Tucker gets to guard the presents under the tree from his brothers and he always makes something nice for his parents to be proud of and love him more. But every year Tucker and his siblings get toys that they have to share and his littlest brother always eats them and then has to go to the hospital. Tucker wished he could get a nice toy just for himself this year.


That must be it! His dad must have gone to the north pole to negotiate with Santa Clause to bring Tucker toys just for him. Oh boy, this will be the best Christmas ever. Tucker was no longer curious about the whereabouts of his missing father. His thoughts had moved on to dreams of a white Christmas and toys. He padded across the living room and climbed up on his sister's divan, curled up, closed his eyes and imagined the best Christmas ever.

The great thing about the cold weather, according to Tucker, is that it makes his blood pump faster and gets him riled up to go chasing some bandit squirrels across the yard. This is his favorite game. Tucker sits still for a good 12.5 seconds and gets a bead on a squirrel. Then he charges. This sometimes infuriates his siblings who will sit for more than 20 minutes to get up on the squirrels before pouncing.

Tucker thinks theirs is a flawed practice for many reasons. First of all, it is cold after all and YHP especially runs the risk of turning into a pupsicle. Secondly, Dex is an unconvincing hunter in his book and Tucker thinks she goes through the motions of hunting just to prove she is a dog.


He thinks she would rather just be inside grooming her paws or something, and staring at their parents.

Well Tucker had a lot of other salient points on his technique, but his mind started drifting to what his brother would look like after a whole day of sitting still and waiting for a squirrel to just jump in his mouth.

Times like these

It is the overwhelming feeling of inadequacy Tucker feels at times like these that make him think he would be better off a wandering hobo again. Tucker has been feeling a bit shafted by the humans lately because his dad who is never around just left again this morning, and his mom who is always cleaning and combing him is all sick and not playing tennis ball towns with him in the nice cold weather. Tucker would be a sad clown, except he really doesn't trust clowns so he would prefer not be associated with them.

This morning, Tucker's dad got up early. Most likely to spend more time playing with him, Tucker thought. But, no. It was to pack his suitcase and leave. Tucker thought this an unfair trick. What if Tucker were on a little league team and his squad had just made the cut for the local playoffs. Would he be able to count on his dad showing up? Would his mother embarrass him in front of the other kids by kissing him and combing his hair? And what if she were overheard by his teammates telling the coach that Tucker is, " a sensitive, handsome boy who is full of love," and that Tucker's mother does not , "appreciate the coach turning her sweet boy into a desensitized, overly competitive goon for the sole purpose of reliving some missed childhood achievement," of the coach.

Tucker wonders if his his big brown eyes were deeper then his parents would stop acting like humans and just spend time with him.

I'm a Pony!

Tucker would like the world to know that he is so strong and tough that tiny monkeys and/ or small-boned children under 5 years old could probably ride him comfortably as if he were some race horse.

Tucker likes prancing about the yard as a pony and asks the world why he shouldn't be allowed to do so. His brother YHP thinks he is a donkey, a cobra and a cat all at the same time -- though these personalities express themselves in different ways. His brother Baron thinks he is a lion and /or big dog. And his other brother, the cat, believes he is part otter and part dog. So Tucker thinks he has a good leg to stand on here and demand equality for his pony - ness.


"I'm a pony," he shouts as he prances around the yard. "I'm a pony!"

His brothers, by the way, are not amused. His sister is good with it though, as are his parents.

Sometimes Tucker thinks the humans just aren't as smart as they claim to be. Not only are they not smart, but easily controlled by his little brothers. Tucker worries that the humans will be completely misled by the soulless masterminds Baron and YHP, that one day they will use their mind powers to command them to sell Tucker to the king of Siam or somebody.

Every day he sees the inky troublemaker YHP get up on the couch or the bed when the humans leave the house; and the Baron sets about nosing in the trash or climbing under the blankets. But Tucker knows the humans tell him to stay off so he does. Sure, his sister does those things too, but she is older and wiser and he shouldn't question her. She might bite him.


And after a full day of doing diabolical acts while the humans are gone, what do these awful brothers of his do? They act as if they never did anything wrong and tell the humans to let them up on their laps while the humans are watching TV or sleeping. Just this morning Tucker's dad caught YHP sneaking downstairs to eat the cat's food.
For punishment, the dad put YHP on his bed and went back to sleep. All Tucker could do was roll his eyes and think up despicable acts that would earn him love and attention from the humans.

Tucker asked his father to show other humans how his brothers use their eyes for evil deeds and control the minds of those who stare into them. Do not be fooled humans, these are stone cold monsters.

On a side note, Tucker loves the cooler weather. He could play tennis ball catch all day if someone would just throw the ball for him.

I show my love by being in the way

Tucker's family has been in need of some attention and cheering up lately. Frst his brother Harlan got sick and that made Tucker sad. Then his brother Baron von Daschund got sick and went to the hospital for a few days. Tucker's dad had to drive him three days in a row. The doctor lady told Tucker's parent's that his brother Baron has Cushings disease and that Baron needed to have medication for life. That made Tucker very sad. He likes to play with his brothers and run around with a tennis ball or tree branch to tease them into playing with him.



Just yesterday, Tucker saw his mommy getting sick. So he decided the best thing to do was to protect her. So he curled up on the bed with her, followed her to the bathroom, to the kitchen, to the living room, and then back to the bedroom. Tucker's dad was out of town and Tucker was worried someone (most likely Tucker) would have to drive her. So Tucker decided it would be nice to tell her this by getting in front of her and show her that he could drive. This tactic, unfortunately, leads to people being tripped by him. But no worries because tucker is a big dog who can carry his own backpack so he can most certainly carry an unconscious person who hit their head after he tripped them.

Tucker's mommy is ok now and his daddy is home. So he is just keeping an eye on them by following them into whatever room they go.

Just another face in the crowd?

Tucker had high hopes about the super cool originality and downright cleverlike neatness of his blog ever since his initial foray into these interwebs. After a few minutes searching for himself, he discovered many of himselves out there. Yes, they had his name, his pov and his penchant for cookie treats. But...they couldn't all be fluffy white Tuckers. Could they?

No. They are other Tuckers with bored humans who help him make people words. But what of these "so-called humans" he stares at with his big, empty brown eyes? They themselves lack the originality and cleverousness he once thought they had. "How so," you ask? He has come to learn through independent research that his name is somewhat overmarketed.

Tucker the Hero Watcher

Tucker is a fan of movie legend Sergio Leone. And he likes superheroes. Because Tucker fancies himself an Italian superhero of sorts. It is with little surprise that he enjoys the serialized laugh-o-lympic film Italian Superman.


Tucker likes to break into the humans' office and get online to watch this while the humans are off doing things not with Tucker.

Who needs words

When you have a blog? Tucker the dog says he doesn't like having to be home all day when the
Humans are not there. Although his siblings are home with him, Tucker feels that:

• the Baron gets too much attention in the press,
• YHP is a lap stealer,
  
• Dexter just works her big brown eyes for extra treats, and
• Chester Copperpots is really a lobster.
  

That is why Tucker will start his own blog to tell the world why he should be given more time with the humans.